Those who take from others

They could be poor burglars stealing from individuals; extremely rich and powerful people stealing from entire countries; or anything in between. If they get caught, they may or may not be punished – depending on their financial abilities and connections – but regardless, their behavior is not acceptable by society at large and generally honest people prefer not to be associated with them.

Generally speaking, society considers such behavior as antisocial, and it is not difficult to feel anger towards such people, especially by those who need to work very hard to support themselves and their families. That makes perfect sense. People feel: “If I can contribute my time and hard work to benefit both society and myself, why shouldn’t everyone?”. It’s not difficult to understand such feelings.

This however, assumes that in essence “they” are just like “us”. But are they?

One is incapable of hurting anyone, in any way, unless they hurt and suffer themselves.

Some of those people who take from others, may feel that it is wrong and judge themselves as wrongdoers. At the same time they continue with theft and are unable to stop, just like any addiction. Some of them may be completely oblivious to their own actions, even when they pay a dear price for it.
It is amazing that some of these people have billions in the bank; they really don’t need any more money but they cannot stop.

It is almost surprising to find fear as part of this formula, but fear often disguises itself as a whole variety of different thoughts and emotions. Fear is part of this equation is various ways:
1) The fear of loss and of lack.
2) The fear of incompetency, of being incapable of doing something else.
3) Fear of being held hostage by accomplices, who may report past wrongdoing if one attempts to change their ways.

Other emotions are also possible:
1) Hate: “Everybody is stupid and they deserve to have everything taken from them”.
2) Anger, resentfulness or contempt: “I am much smarter than most people. I should have much more than others”.
3) Disappointment, frustration or retaliation: “I used to play by the rules and got crushed. Now I’m going to play by my own rules.”

Any of the above emotions are the result of suffering and hurting. Like all toxic emotions, they have very limited logic to them, which is also an indication of what limited view of the world such people have. They don’t see what many honest people know intuitively, moreover, they may be afraid to change and allow themselves to see beyond their current capabilities.

If punishing such people had been effective, we would have seen a decrease in crimes. But in reality we see the opposite. Punishment cannot solve this situation. We cannot lock them away and pretend that they are gone and the problem is solved. If we are to help ourselves as a healthy society, we must help these people.

Judgement, criticism, contempt, fear, hate and similar emotions, will not allow us to make any positive change. It is only by listening, becoming compassionate and with a lot of patience – like that of a loving parent to a misbehaving child – that we can begin, slowly and with many setbacks, to show such people unconditional love and acceptance. With time, it is those positive emotions that will help us achieve a positive change for them and for us. Love and compassion are true healers. And remember; by helping the other, we help ourselves.

Oded Ben-Ami

Oded Ben-Ami is a mystic, Chi-Gong teacher, mentor, writer, and musician. He dedicates his time to the exploration of the non-physical realm, its effect on our physical world and the means by which it can be affected by the mind

This Post Has 3 Comments

  1. Basic psychology
    Anger, hate is self infilcted due to inability to face realy about one self. Lack of responding in case of adversity is the problem…

    When the above is solved peace will engulf the individual in all are of life.

    1. The last few years have been a difficult journey. My twenty two year marriage ended from an affair by my husband (retired military with PTSD) I filed for divorce and moved 900 miles away to my hometown. I had not been to my home state in sixteen years. I reached out again, to someone I hadn’t seen in 35 years and ‘fell in love.’ After ten months, this native person of my home, sent me a text to end our relationship. My dad had died 4 months into this relationship, leaving me an orphan. (my mom passed in 07) Strange sort of love. I wrote a novel, of my healing process. and within it’s pages I learned, I am an empath. And I have lived with my life surrounded by abusive people. This ‘love’ was obsessed with narcissistic and borderline personality disorders. He told me I had been a victim of my dads abusive behaviors my entire life and my ‘getting mentally healthy’ was all he wished for me. Suffering from PTSD myself, his anger, negative views for EVERYONE he came in contact with, to even getting a coffee to go at a local mini mart, he was so analytical of everyone he came in contact with. If soemone was rude in the store, he’d spend twenty minutes bitching about it afterwards. He could, “smell them a mile away.” (narcissistic ppl) Odd, after ten months he claimed I was a ‘borderline’ and hid my true colors well. I spent six months absolutely devastated, believing, I actually hurt someone. I of course hadn’t. He used me. He himself suffers from severe OCD and a sensory perception issues. I know this because he encouraged me to read about mental illnesses to ‘get healthy’ for four months. That alone, sent me on a whirlwind of a PTSD mode, I couldn’t free myself from. I can see how his perception in life saw me as a borderline, because there are always two ways to look at everything. From a heart filled with God’s love, it took me 52 years to learn about being an empath. So, regardless of all the hurt this man placed in my life (that I allowed) I am grateful for the journey. It brought me to a higher sense of spirituality, and about loving myself enough to not let the abundance of negatives in this world to be absorbed by myself.

  2. I, myself, am on a path of healing and learning unconditional love – even for those that are no longer here – those that have caused extremely deep hurt. I have lived with this for many years, almost my entire life – it has caused me health problems and more. I recently had a meeting with my priest and he told me something so very simple… this terribly hurtful person NO LONGER HAS ANY POWR OVER ME.. What a concept!! I
    went to the cemetery to tell this person just those exact words…… and to my amazement….. I came away with about 50 years of burden (thinking it had been my fault) taken off my shoulder. I felt as light as a feather…. imagine that!! Just to ‘all’ to him took away his ‘POWER’ over me. JOY..EUPHORIA…RELIEF.

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